Friday, January 19, 2007

? / Feeling Radioactive

If somebody came up to me now and asked how I'm feeling, I'd answer that I currently feel radioactive.

In chemistry, a substance exhibits radioactivity if it cycles back and forth between an excited state and a ground state while periodically decaying down in its own atomic composition. Only a few substances are naturally radioactive but in theory, all substances (with the exception of hydrogen, which cannot be decayed further) can be induced to display radioactivity by applying enough excitation or conversely forcing it to decay.

So what induced me to feel radioactive today? My end-of-year Goals and Performance Appraisal (GPA) discussion with my supervisor.

To sum it up, the discussion made me feel good, then disappointed, then great, then disappointed again. And so on and so forth.

My supervisor's appraisal of my 2006 performance was excellent. Yay... excitement! But, and to quote him, "due to the needs of the business and your specialized skillbase, we cannot afford to release you." Ground. "However, as soon as we have developed or identified your replacement we will nominate you for movement to SGS." Slight excitement. "By the way, don't be surprised if your colleague is moved out earlier than you; it doesn't mean that she's better than you. It's because you're important to the refinery now." Decay.

Crap. I think I need a drink tonight.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

hi stip! indispensable ka... thats something to be happy about coz it simply means you work excellently and they can't afford to lose you. galing! =) everything will fall into place especially for someone who's as smart as you in due time. cheers! wishing u the best! -carmela

stip said...

oist carmela and tinters, thanks! haaaay... yup, i have to be happy of my circumstances somewhat. =)

and somebody here actually told me that my situation helps "build character". baaah! hehehe... :D