++ Guess What I'm So Excited About?

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Eight and a half hours to go... (ipod mini ipod mini ipod mini ipod mini ipod mini...)

Thanks to Chie and Carmela!

! Mushy Moment

minsan lang akong magpaka-mushy. :D

got this one from one of the discussion boards i occasionally visit.

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When you look for it, why can you not find it?
When you stop looking, why does it find you?
When you search for it, why do you do it in all the wrong places?
When you give up, why do you run into it in the most unlikely of places?

When you let go, is it because you love too much or because you don't love enough?
What brings more pain -- loving or leaving?
Is the realization that you no longer pine for anyone a liberating or lonely feeling?

When romantic relationships spark no interest, is it because you love yourself too much or because you love others too little?
When you leave,should you feel dispirited? Or should you feel invigorated?
When you are left behind, should you feel lost? Or should you feel emancipated?

When you stop loving, is it the end or the beginning?

When you cling to it, you lose it. When you avoid it, it tracks you down.
Defining it will confound you.

Coveting it will destroy you. But if you can just let it be, it can be a gift that can be appreciated for what it is and all that it can bring you.

When you love no matter what, are you brave or are you mad?
When you fall in love, are you blessed or are you cursed?
When you refuse to fall out of love, are you determined or deranged?
Does love inspire? Or does it drain?

When you are resolute, are you romantic or are you rabid?

Why do people say they love when they don't?
And why do they say they don't when they do?
Why is a declaration of love the hardest of statements to make when it is real?
And the easiest to make when it is false?

Why can a child declare with certainty and without fear, that she is loved?
No matter how many times she has been berated?
Because against conflicting words and actions, repeated denials and numerous contradictions, love shows itself when it is there. And even when no words are spoken, much is said.

Why do people love even when they are not loved back?
Why do people love a little, love a lot, love deeply, love foolishly, love forever, love again?
Why do people love at all? Does love empower? Or does it enfeeble?

Why do we see something in someone that others don't?
Why do our hearts beat faster for one person against the rest?
Why can we forgive someone for sins we cannot forgive others?
Why do we love someone and not someone else?

As Pascal put it, "The heart has its reasons which reason cannot know."

+ Power Up!

>>> Create character: STIP
>>> Assign race: Amateur wall climber
>>> Distribute skill points
>> Strength: 6 / 10
>> Flexibility: 9 / 10
>> Endurance: 5 / 10
>> Agility: 4 / 10

>>> Equip item: NEW V10 Climbing Shoes
>> Item effects:
(+) Agility +5
(+) Strength +1
(+) Confidence +10%
(+) Audience impact - high
(-) Color = yellow
(-) Initially drains endurance due to tight shoe fit; can potentially kill the user's toenail or two if precautions are not taken
(-) Causes Crissy to hide shoes when unequipped.

Hahaha... I was finally able to break-in my new climbing shoes. Climbed at Power-up Pasig last night with the regulars. :D

+ Weekend Bs!

Naaah... the title doesn't mean "Weekend Bullsh*t". Actually, it's the contrary. :D

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B1: Badminton

I competed in a company-sponsored badminton tournament last Saturday. Me and my partner played 4 matches and we were vying actually for a slot in the championships.

With the exception of a few mishits on my backcourt dropshots, I'd say my game was better than decent last Saturday. The tournament organizers decided to partner me with a novice female player. Hahaha... Part of me was glad (that means the organizers think that my badminton skills are good enough to compensate for my partner's lack of skill and still provide decent competition against our opponents) while a part of me was disappointed (out of the 4 teams we played against, there were two teams which were men's doubles).

Anyway, I was literally Superman on the playing court during our matches because I had to lunge, hop, run and smash at majority of the playing area. But I guess my performance wasn't good enough. We were short of one set-win to qualify for the finals. Out of 8 sets played, we managed to win only 5.

But a lot of spectators commented that we had a great chance of winning the finals match if we made it through. The occasional "Nice one, Stip!", "Good one!" and the "Ooooohhh!!!" cheers from the crowd after a long rally or a spectacular save/attack was rewarding in a way.

Oh well, those are the breaks. Anyway, I'm looking forward to the Chairman's Cup in September.

Oh, and my butt and thighs were sore the next day when I woke up. Too much lunging from chasing the shuttlecock all over the court, I suppose.

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B2: Bookworming Harry Potter 6

Okay this is a new record for me. I finished a Harry Potter book in less than 24 hours. It took me a about 15 hours to read through the whole thing, all in one day.

I got HP6: The Half-Blood Prince at lunchtime last Saturday (yep, I ran off to the mall in-between my matches to claim my book reservation). I read the first chapter in-between my last two matches, another two chapters before I slept that night, about 20 chapters as soon as I woke up at 7:30 am on Sunday until lunch time, left our house in Manila and began my drive back to Batangas. I made a stop-over at Petrol SLEX for Starbucks. Hehehe... I finished the last four chapters there.

My insights: HP6 lacks climax and conflict, but I suppose JK Rowling is preparing the stage for a grand finale for HP7. And there are two major twists in the story which left me guessing and made my expectations for HP7 exceedingly high. I wonder how JK Rowling will conclude the series...

But still, it's a good read. Not as good as HP3 or HP4 but still a worthwhile read. If you ask me, I paid 1299 Php for the book but I think I'll place readership value at 899 Php tops.

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B3: Bidyo Games (sic)

Finally, after two months of scrounging pirated PS2 game retailers, I managed to find a copy of Digital Devil Saga and Arc the Lad. That'll take care of my PS2 lull for a few weeks. Already started playing DDS last night.

And those are my weekend Bs.

Bwahahahahaha. Baliw. :D

+ I Have an Airsoft Dilemna

Last Saturday I played airsoft as usual. Wahoo! Two weekends in a row!

But I encountered a "slight" dilemna.

No, it's not about my gun, although my SIG 552 has been misfiring a bit too often. One of my hi-capacity magazines has been misfeeding and I'll have to disassemble and repair it this week.

No, it's not about my gameplay. Last weekend's game was one of my best games. I happened to "hit" Bushmaster finally! Bwahahahaha... And I hit him at his armpit! I was the last man surviving on our team versus four others (BM included) so I layed prone in a sniping position, using the shadows and glare from the ambient light to my best advantage.

I finally completed my airsoft hitlist of four persons (all of whom I have high regard for their gameplay): BM, Lac, SlagX and Lord_Tyler.

My dilemna isn't related to my relationship with other players. Oftentimes I would prefer to be the quiet and silent type (mostly because of heat exhaustion). I play cleanly and honestly. In case of zombies, I always keep my cool. I don't think I have a problem with that.

Here's my problem:

In 18 months of playing this addicting weekend sport, my official status as a player has always been "lonewolf". No formal team affiliations. My reason is plain and simple: the nature of my work makes my schedule unpredictable. Also factor in my mom's sudden ideas of having a family get-together, my badminton invitations, various events and gimmicks organized by my high school and college friends, the occasional dates... Regular attendance to games will not be a simple matter for me.

Recently I've been playing under the umbrella of the RBG Mercs (because I acquired their team uniform sans their team patch --- their uniform is really great for jungle games) but occasionally I would team up with Team Zero (for my Sunday games) or SOE (by loose affiliation with the RBG Mercs). On several occassions other players will ask me if I'm an RBG Merc or an SOE player or a Zero player. I just tell them that I'm a friendly lonewolf.

Last Saturday I played with Team Mission Specific. And it so happens that their game that I attended was an OP UNITY game. Strictly for members only, AND potential recruits according to Mad. Several times last Saturday I was asked if I'll be finally joining a team.

And that's my dilemna.

Pros/Cons of Remaining a Lonewolf:
+ Flexible schedule
+ No team affiliation
+ No uniform requirement; I can wear what I feel like wearing
+ No hard feelings
(-) No team affiliation = no team identity
(-) Difficulty in signing up for team events such as bivys
(-) Possible handicap on some gamesites

Pros/Cons of Joining TMS:
+ Good crowd (I know about 40% of them at least)
+ Identification
+ I'll admit it, their current BDU is according to my taste (hahaha)
+ In terms of rapport, I'm most comfortable with their group
(--) Potentially hard feelings, lalo na sa ibang matagal ng nag-r-recruit sa 'kin
? the initiation (i hope they're pulling my leg)
? the 25k membership fee (i seriously hope they're pulling my leg, or that it's negotiable at least; pambili ko na yan ng upgraded na G36C eh)
? my attendance (but the way I gather it, a lot of them are missing-in-action)

I've a full week to think about this.

So what will it be? Drop the 'lonewolf' status and check out team membership?

If I didn't have so much fun in last Saturday's game, then making the decision will be an easy one.

Almost 4 pm. I think I'll hit the gym to clear my head.

Birthday Greeting

Kits = big guy, jock stereotype. Me = small, nerdy-looking guy. That was 10 years ago.

In the last ten years we've known and hang out together:

1. We've argued major-time over a card game of "1-2-3 Pass".

2. The first time we both got drunk and wasted was at Tia Maria's in Malate, after downing 5 pitchers of those margaritas after a month into the 1st trimester of our first school year. The next day I had an allergy attack.

3. We went head-to-head at soccer during our PE, and it's the only sport that I managed to beat you at school. It turned out that I'm a better dribbler than you hahaha. Later on, we'd be reassigned to other playing positions: you as striker for your team and me as the goalie for our team. Hahaha... remember the time that you kicked the ball so hard for a penalty and i managed to block it with my head and i ended up with a nose bleed?

4. We've done the whole bit of interviewing hospitality girls at Malate, Taft, Roxas Boulevard and asking their 'rates'.

5. You almost drowned me by dragging me out to the sea on one of our term break escapades, knowing that I don't know how to swim at that time. Damn you. Hehehe...

6. Not once I offered you help on your courses, and not once you asked for mine. We both respected our own and other's academic abilities.

7. That my first drag of jutes was at your car just outside Power Plant mall.

8. That my second drag of jutes was with your mom at your house, and we ended up laughing and hungry the whole night. Food trip! (and your mom is cool by the way)

9. Sleepovers, mostly often because we end up drinking too much at your house and you and your mom wouldn't allow me to drink and drive.
9.1. and for that, your mom refers to me as her "second son". touchy but mushy.
9.2. and because of that, you started calling me your "kid brother".


10. Being the mediator between you and your wife whenever you argue. The funniest one was when you were arguing about your preferred sex position hahahaha.

11. In our bar drinking sessions, how we'd try to best each other in getting to be acquainted with some "lonely ladies". Winning formula: send them a free drink c/o the bartender.

12. And again on sex life, how you kept track of mine and you kept on updating me about yours.

13. Us witnessing each other's careers, and being the other's career advisor.

14. You leaving bachelorhood, and making me as your best man and eventually the godparent of your first son.

15. Most embarassing moment in you presence: the time we had dinner at Italianni's with your mom, and she asked me to touch her boobs and check if it's firm or not.

I'll add on to this list as I remember them along.

Now, Kits = big guy sporting a daddy look (belly and all, hahaha). Me = still the same guy but 20 pounds bulkier.

Happy birthday, bespren! Here's to another year of keeping the friendship alive!

Music for the Realist

When I get my iPod mini (yes, I'm getting one from Australia thru my good friends Chie and Carmela... it's 3K pesos cheaper there), this will be the first song I'll put in.

I love this song because it strikes me as "realistic". Not fancy, not cheesy, not too convenient, not legendary, not romantic.

Oh, and the intro theme is very catchy.

Blurry
by Puddle of Mudd

Everything's so blurry
and everyone's so fake
and everybody's empty
and everything is so messed up
pre-occupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl.

You could be my someone
You could be my sea
You know that I'll protect you
From all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
Imagine where you are
There's oceans in-between us
But that's not very far.

Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
Well ya shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me.
Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
Well you shoved it in my face.

Everyone is changing
There's no one left that's real
To make up your own ending
and let me know just how you feel
'Cause I am lost without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl.

You could be my someone
You could be my sea
You know that I will save you
From all of the unclean
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder where you are
There's oceans in-between us
but that's not very far.

Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
Well ya shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me.
Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
Well you shoved it in my face.

Nobody told me what you thought
Nobody told me what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn
Told you when to run away
nobody told you where to hide
nobody told you what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
showed you when to runaway.